Anachronism

A little while ago, a friend of mine was telling me a story about his high school’s school nurse. He told me that the nurse was a man and that he was proud of his job and then paused for comedic effect, assuming I’d think that was funny. Apparently he’d forgotten who his audience was. “And?” I asked. He proceeded to tell me that the funniest part was that the male nurse's wife was a doctor. Again, he paused.

“It’s backwards," he said.

Of course I was offended. The frightening part was that I was expected to laugh with him. When I told him why the comment upset me, he clarified that it was meant as a joke. He didn’t actually think that.

What bothered me most was that on some level I felt like I was being a bitch for not laughing, for bursting his bubble and pointing up that what he’d said wasn’t funny at all. It was actually incredibly sexist. Why did I hesitate at all? No one would blame me for standing up to him if he’d made a racist joke? Why is sexism any different?

This is not at all an attack on my friend. He apologized sincerely. The big problem is the fact that this kind of backwards thinking, so antiquated and ignorant, is being encouraged by laughter. Laughter trivializes problems. If you can laugh about them, they can’t be that bad.

To me, this comment sounds anachronistic. It doesn’t belong here. I’d respond the same way if I saw a Model T putting along the highway. What is it doing in the minds of the generation that’s soon to be in charge?

What good is a woman’s doctorate-level education if it isn’t respected? It makes me wonder where we were left after the embers from all those burning bras burned out.

-E